The One With Marcus Grodentz

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:00:33]:
Hello. Welcome back. Glad you could join me for, another, episode with a great guest. My guest this week, well, they did, their formal training and apprenticeship as a journalist on the Watford Observer newspaper, and then then worked for a London news agency, and they also worked as a freelance, for the nationals for radio and for TV. They moved into a senior career in local government public relations, and they were involved as a key member of the emergency planning team for a number of major incidents, and for helping to a row to arrange royal visits by her majesty the queen. They’re also a member and former president of Voice of Wales speakers club, which is part of Toastmasters International. So as well as as having a great background in journalism and public relations, they’re also a highly accomplished, profession highly accomplished, speaker. They also had a bombshell drop on them about 12 months ago, and we’re gonna find out a little bit more about that throughout the course of today’s episode.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:01:37]:
But first, let’s introduce our guest. Let’s bring him in, Marcus Gordon. Marcus, how are you doing, sir?

Marcus Grodenz [00:01:46]:
Keith, thank you very much indeed for having me. I’m doing very well. Thank you.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:01:51]:
Glad to hear. So, Marcus, we we’ve heard we’ve heard your impressive bio. Who is the gentleman behind the bio? Who is Marcus?

Marcus Grodenz [00:02:00]:
That’s a that’s a great question. It’s one that, I I ask virtually all of my clients, you know, my favourite coach coaching question is, who are you? And, it’s not, what you do. It’s not, you know, so it’s not the job that you do. It’s not the position you hold. You know, a mother, a brother, a father, a sister, a life coach. It’s it’s the the culmination of all the things that you’ve experienced through your life. So, yeah, I’m 73 years old, and I’ve had a very interesting life. I’ve had a lot of ups and downs.

Marcus Grodenz [00:02:47]:
And I think it’s made me a more well rounded person, a more tolerant person. And I I think it’s made me, a more understanding person. So the the coaching I do is is quite soft coaching. It’s not in your face sort of stuff, because that’s not who I am. So I guess that’s me in in the broader sense.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:03:16]:
You come from a background in in PR and journalism. Tell us a little bit about that. How how did you get into it?

Marcus Grodenz [00:03:25]:
It’s, it’s interesting. I, when I was at school, I loved English, I loved drama. I had the the most fantastic drama teacher who I had all the way through my secondary school career, a lady named miss Davis. And I I remember, halfway through my senior school, so I would have been about 13, 14 years old. And I remember confiding in her and saying, Miss Davis, when I leave school I think I’d like to be an actor. And she put her head to one side and she put her hand on my shoulder and she said, as gently as she could, Marcus, have you considered the civil service? And, so that was my acting career out the window, and my second love was English and writing. And, I I I belong to a youth club and I edited the youth club newsletter. And, the day I left school, my I was unemployed, I didn’t have a job.

Marcus Grodenz [00:04:32]:
I was 16 years old, and I was leaving school. And that very evening, my mother saw an advert in the London Evening News, for an Office Junior for a newspaper agency. And my cousin, a guy called Geoffrey Levy, was, editor of the hickey column on the Daily Express. And he wrote me a very nice reference, and I started off as a tea boy, on a, a London news agency. And at 16 years old, that was a hell of an experience. That was certainly being thrown in at the deep end.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:05:10]:
I can imagine. I can imagine. Yeah. So where did that take you? I mean, what what’s well, well, I guess, actually, a better question is what what would be the the thing you’re most proud of in your your journalism side of your career?

Marcus Grodenz [00:05:26]:
That’s difficult one because I’m a general news reporter. So I just covered a whole variety of of of of general news stories. So I got to meet all sorts of different people. I think on the news agency, when I was sort of, like, 16 years old, we were we covered what was the Heather Green train crash in South London. One of the worst train crashes, in English, rail history. And, you know, 40 old people died, 70 old people were injured. And at 16, I was in the office, if you like, in the thick of it. And that was my introduction to, current news on the spot reporting.

Marcus Grodenz [00:06:14]:
A real eye opener for me. But I went from the agency to the Watford Observer where I did my formal training. And then freelanced, as you say, for national papers, evening papers, radio, and TV. And I was specialising in in local government stories. And it was a bit of a natural move for a lot of journalists at the time to move from journalism into local government PR. And apart from anything else, the the hours were better, and the pay was a lot better. So, so I I my very first job was the London borough of Harringay, where people like Jeremy Corbyn were local councillors. And, one of the most left wing councils in London at the time.

Marcus Grodenz [00:07:07]:
And again, being thrown in at the deep end, because all of the press tended to refer to Harringay as loony left Harringay council.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:07:19]:
Yeah.

Marcus Grodenz [00:07:19]:
So, yeah. I I I had a pretty hard time as a press officer, for one of the most left wing councils in London. And from there, I went to one of the most right wing councils in London, which was the London borough of Wandsworth, which was Maggie Thatcher’s flagship local authority. So I went from, one end one end of the political spectrum to the other end of the political spectrum. And, again, that was very much an eye opener for me. I can imagine.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:07:54]:
I can imagine. Yes. So you cover the, the whole spectrum as you say. Yeah. Good. And then then you you got into, you got into, arranging, planning and arranging or not planning incidents, manage planning to manage incidents and even arranging, royal visits and and

Marcus Grodenz [00:08:12]:
Yeah. That, I I did too. 1 at one at Harringay where I wasn’t quite so involved, but I I was involved. But, my last, PR, appointment was as head of PR for, Gloucester City Council, where the Queen came to visit. And if you know anything at all about royal visits, they’re arranged months months in advance. And my job was to work with the queen’s press secretary, organising the media side of things. And the route she walked, the people she would meet, the people she would talk to were all carefully mapped out. And we walked that route with all of the senior officials and the security people and the police.

Marcus Grodenz [00:09:01]:
We must have walked that route several times over. And halfway through that visit, the queen was going to have lunch, with Prince Philip. And I was with the queen’s press secretary, and we went into a little side room where there was some refreshments for the staff. And the queen’s press secretary said to me, I’ve got to leapfrog over onto the next visit now and make sure everything’s okay. I’m gonna leave you in charge of the Rota Party. Now the Rota Party are the journalists who’ve got the media access to the royals. You know, there’s a photographer, a cameraman. They’re the people who are taking the snaps and film over their shoulders and are standing literally right next to them.

Marcus Grodenz [00:09:51]:
So she took me over to the, head of the Queen’s close protection squad and said, this is Marcus. I’m leaving him in charge of the Rota party while I go on to the next stop. And he said, yeah, that’s, that’s fine. If it’s okay with you, it’s okay with me. So she disappeared, and he looked at me. And he was a big bull of a man with a shaved head and an immaculate suit because underneath the suit, there were guns and stuff. Yeah. And, he looked at me, and he said, who exactly are you? But the point is, we’d we’d we’d we’d rehearsed all of this time and time again.

Marcus Grodenz [00:10:32]:
And at no stage had she ever said to me, when it gets to this point, I’m gonna leave you in charge of the rape party. You know, so, the queen and Prince Philip, sort of, finished their meal and came out into the room where all the dignitaries were lined up to say their goodbyes. And I was trying to herd the rosa party, which is a bit like trying to herd cats. And I, you know, you know, and and she looked across at me, and I looked across at her, and our eyes met. And, I, you know, I I could swear that she the thought that went through her mind was, I’m sure the last time I looked, my press secretary was a woman. But it all went off okay, and I didn’t end up in the tower. But, it just goes to show, no matter how many times you practice and rehearse things, you’ve always got to be prepared for the unexpected.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:11:34]:
Absolutely. Yes. Absolutely. Marvelous. Now I mentioned in the intro that you had a bombshell dropped on you about about 12 months ago. Yeah.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:11:45]:
We’re gonna explore that, for the rest of the the, episode. But just before we do, one other facet of what you what you, what you do that’s, that is interesting and will, I am sure tie into how you cope with with the bombshell. As you’re you’re coaching and also your public speaking, how how did you get into that?

Marcus Grodenz [00:12:06]:
Again, interesting. My wife and I went on a cruise, and on cruise ships, they have speakers. And, they have some very nice, very large theatres on these cruise ships. And there was a guy doing a talk, and I said to my wife, I’m just gonna go and have a listen because it sounds like it could be quite interesting. And the subject, he was, an ex international policeman, involved in, you know, sort of international drugs and stuff. And his talk was really interesting, but his presentation left a bit to be desired. And I thought, you know what? I could do this, and I’d love to do it. And in my sort of corporate role, I, I coached senior politicians and senior officers on media interviewing techniques.

Marcus Grodenz [00:12:56]:
I coached them on presentation skills. So I thought, you know what, I can I can do this sort of stuff? But maybe it wouldn’t hurt to, just to find out how good I am because I never really get any feedback. So I joined the Voice of Wales speakers club, and suddenly found out that there was a whole load of stuff that I didn’t know I didn’t know about public speaking. So, I’ve been a member now for several years. I do a lot of speaking to local organisations, local groups, women’s institutes organisations, around my PR career. I do talks, motivational talks. And, I’ve built that into my coaching practice. And, yeah, something I really love doing, but, it’s also helped me, deal with what we’re now going to be talking about.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:13:59]:
Yeah. So the let’s let everybody in on what happened. What happened about about a year ago?

Marcus Grodenz [00:14:07]:
Yeah. You’re absolutely right. It’s almost exactly a year ago, that I was diagnosed with incurable prostate cancer. And it’s one of these diseases that has no obvious side effects. For me, it started, with some problems with my waterworks. And I went to my GP, and he said, oh, it’s, you know, he he he gave me, that thing that we all love, an internal examination. And he wasn’t too worried. He gave me some tablets that, he he said would be helpful.

Marcus Grodenz [00:14:52]:
And he said this is, a problem not at all unusual for a man of your vintage, as he put it. And, I went back to him after a couple of months and said, you know what? These tablets really aren’t doing anything for me. So he said, well, look, I’m not particularly worried. I’m not talking cancer, but it wouldn’t hurt to go and see a specialist. And that’s what I did. And the specialist said, I’m not particularly worried, but if you were a relative of mine, it wouldn’t hurt to go and have some more tests done. So I had a CT scan and an MRI scan, and we went back to the specialist to get the results. And my wife and I sat there and looked at him, and he looked at us.

Marcus Grodenz [00:15:35]:
And he said, I wasn’t expecting this. And you’ve got prostate cancer. I’m afraid it’s, it’s incurable. It spread to your lungs and your bones. I’m very sorry. And your treatment will start today. And, wow, you know, I’ve gone from being told that it’s nothing particular to worry about to the fact that you’ve got an incurable disease. And that is an awful bombshell to you you just can’t take it in.

Marcus Grodenz [00:16:15]:
You can’t, you can’t process that information. And it’s it’s been a year now, and it’s taken me, I guess, the best part of a year to process that and to deal with it, and to start to come out of the other side of that. And, my journalism and my public speaking has been a big help because I’ve started a blog about my journey. I’ve I’ve started doing talks about my journey. I was encouraged by my wife, to go to, this fabulous cancer charity called Maggie’s in Cardiff, which is absolutely brilliant. It’s a nationwide charity, and I go to their branch in Cardiff. I’ve I’ve joined their men’s cancer support group, made some really good friends there. And I’m working with the Maggie’s press office, to try and spread the message and raise awareness about this disease.

Marcus Grodenz [00:17:26]:
Because for us guys, there is no screening program for it. The only thing we have is the PSA test, and that’s not terribly reliable. My PSA test, when I had it done, came back very low. And it was only because I had these other tests done that they discovered it. So it it’s an unreliable test, but it is the only one that us guys have got.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:17:54]:
Wow. Wow. And you you you say it’s it’s it’s incurable, and yet there are virtually no symptoms when you when it’s it’s still in the earlier earlier times, and the only available real test is pretty hit and miss.

Marcus Grodenz [00:18:11]:
Yeah. So if it’s caught early enough, it’s it’s curable. But, you know, you know, there’s a number of guys in the support group that I go to who’ve got prostate cancer. And for all of us, it was caught too late. And now it’s just a case of I mean, you could live for a very long time with it. They just can’t cure it. So I’m on a hormone therapy treatment. So I’ve not had chemo.

Marcus Grodenz [00:18:40]:
I’ve not had radiation. But I’m on a hormone therapy treatment. And it’s pretty brutal, to be honest, for us guys, apart from the fact that we go through all of the things that ladies go through when they’re going through the change. So, you know, sort of hot sweats and mood changes, getting terribly emotional, all of that sort of stuff, which is quite difficult to deal with. But I burst into tears one day, and my wife was looking at me and said, Marcus, what’s wrong? I said, I’ve got absolutely no idea. Absolutely no idea. I was crying my eyes out, and I had no idea what what was going on. And so you’ve got all of these, things going on.

Marcus Grodenz [00:19:34]:
There’s some very personal physical changes that that that that take place as well, which are, you know, for us guys quite quite difficult to deal with. And, yeah, it’s it it it’s quite a tough regime, But for me, at the moment, it seems to be doing what it’s supposed to do. So while it’s, the other thing that we have to contend with is fatigue. And, I went to a workshop at Maggies on on fatigue, and they explained it to us as, a form of extreme tiredness that bears no relationship to the amount of energy you’ve just expended. So I can do something very little and be wiped out for the rest of the day. I mowed the lawn on Saturday, and our lawn’s not that big. But I mowed the lawn, and then I was just flaked out for the afternoon. So you have to get used to managing your time.

Marcus Grodenz [00:20:41]:
You have to get used to managing your energy. And you have to get used to a completely different way of life. And, as I say, I think it’s taken me the best part of the year to go through those transitions, to go through the psychological stuff, the emotional stuff. So, I I you know, the whole point of sharing these things is, you know, yes, I’m on antidepressants, which have made a big difference to me, that have helped enormously. Yes, I’ve been through some counselling. My wife’s a counsellor, but she can’t counsel me. So I’ve been through some counselling, which was very helpful. And, yes, I’ve I’ve joined, this men’s group at Maggies.

Marcus Grodenz [00:21:28]:
And it’s it’s just really great to be able to speak to a bunch of other guys. I’ll give you a for instance. Prostate cancer obviously affects the prostate, so it affects your need and ability to go to the loo. I was finding that if I was out and about, as I got nearer home, my need to go to the loo would get progressively worse. And by the time I got to my front door, I would be absolutely desperate. I’d barely be able to put the key in the lock, barely be able to get through the door, and I’d throw the key to y, and I’d rush into the loo, and I just about make it. And I was talking about this to the guys in the support group. And they said, Marcus, you’re not alone.

Marcus Grodenz [00:22:23]:
It’s called frontal syndrome, and it’s a real thing. And I said, thank heavens for that. I said, I thought it was just me. So being able to share these things with other people and know that it’s not just you, that there’s, you know, that it is a thing, that, your medication will help you to control that over a period of time. And and and the other guys are going through exactly the same stuff, is such a relief. And writing a blog and sharing some very personal stuff is quite cathartic for me as well. So and hopefully it’s helping people. Someone I know, off the back of my blogs and my talks that I’m doing, went and had, a blood test.

Marcus Grodenz [00:23:20]:
And he got back in touch with me, and he said, Marcus, I haven’t got prostate cancer, but they’ve discovered I’ve got non Hodgkin’s. And, I mean, that’s quite serious. But at least he found out not earlier than he would otherwise have done. And other people I know have said off the back of, my blogs and stuff, they’ve gone and had themselves tested. And that’s what it’s all about. It’s, just spreading the message. It affects 1 in 8 white men and 1 in 4 black men. And, as I said, there’s no real obvious signs.

Marcus Grodenz [00:24:06]:
Mine started with, problems going to the loo.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:24:10]:
Yeah. Wow. So it affects affected a lot of people, but as you say, there’s no real obvious symptoms certainly in the early stages.

Marcus Grodenz [00:24:22]:
So, yeah. So, you know, it’s a bit of a mission of mine now to, you know, try and spread the message. It’s why I’m working with, the Maggie’s charity. It’s why I wear a a prostate and a wristband because hopefully that’s an opportunity maybe to start conversations with people. And and just get the message out there. You don’t it’s just such a common disease and, you know, it it kills a lot of guys. But hopefully, it’s something that I’ll be able to live with for some time to come. Certainly, my medication seems to be doing what it’s supposed to at the moment.

Marcus Grodenz [00:25:05]:
So, yeah, you just live every day and try and make the most of every day.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:25:12]:
Yeah. Yeah. Basically, it’s not curable, but it’s manageable.

Marcus Grodenz [00:25:17]:
Yeah. As one of the nurses I spoke to said to me, a lot of guys die with prostate cancer, not from prostate cancer.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:25:28]:
Got it. Which is subtle, but very important difference.

Marcus Grodenz [00:25:32]:
Yep. Absolutely. Absolutely. So, so, yeah, that was my that was my bombshell, and it really was a a a a bombshell moment.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:25:44]:
I I I imagine. And, thank thank you for for taking some time out to come and and share that with us and to let us know a bit about the story. And, as you say, hopefully, to raise a bit more awareness, about prostate cancer. 1 in 4 black men and 1 in 1 in 8 white men, you say Yeah. Over over their life. Get it?

Marcus Grodenz [00:26:07]:
Yeah. And and and thank you for the opportunity to, you know, to do that. It it is an important message and, hopefully, it will help some other people.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:26:19]:
Certainly hope so. Thank thank you, Marcus. I mean, for anybody who wants to find out a bit more about you and and maybe get in touch with you or find out a bit more about what you’re going through or how you can help people, what’s the best way for them to do that?

Marcus Grodenz [00:26:31]:
My website is, Novus Life Coaching, dotco.uk. And, my phone number is 07915888168. And I’m happy to receive phone calls or texts on that.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:26:51]:
Oh, fantastic. You know, I’ll pop all of those details. I’ll also pop in link, link for Maggie’s, cancer charity support as well. I’ll pop all

Marcus Grodenz [00:26:59]:
of that into the It is it is a brilliant charity. I can’t tell you what a difference it’s made to me. They’re a great charity. They’d appreciate any support that can be given.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:27:12]:
Absolutely. So I’ll pop all of those details into the show notes, which you’ll be able to find user place KeithBlakemoreNoble.com/show – look for the one with Marcus Grodenz. Find all the details or just go straight to Marcus’s webpage, Novus Life Coaching dotco.uk. Marcus, thank you so much for, taking time out with us. We know each other out outside of here, so I’m sure we will we will catch up many, many times. And, I wish you a a a long and happy rest of your life as well. It’s good to hear that, although it’s not curable, it’s well managed, which which is reassuring, I imagine.

Marcus Grodenz [00:27:52]:
Indeed. And thank you again for the opportunity. I really appreciate it.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:27:56]:
My pleasure. Thank you dear listener. Thank you dear viewer for for catching us. Do check out Marcus, check out Maggie’s. And remember to give us a like, a comment, a share, subscribe. Give us a review on your favourite podcast platform. It all helps to spread the word. I will catch you in another episode very soon.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:28:14]:
Meanwhile, I will leave you with, Marcus’s favorite quote. A year from now, you’ll be sorry that you didn’t start today.