The One About Embracing Change

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:00:32]:
Hey, Keith. Well, hello there. Hello. Welcome to another episode. Today, we are exploring embracing change. Embracing change as as a form of growth. So that’s what we’re gonna look at over the next half hour or so together. Hopefully, you enjoy this.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:00:48]:
Hopefully, you get some useful bits out of this. Do grab a pen, a paper, notepad, whatever. Scribble some notes down as you go along, and remember if you like it, give us a comment to share or like or subscribe. Give us a review. It all helps. So, I guess we should probably start off by exploring, exploring change, the nature of change. Change is change is crucial for our environmental well-being and for our personal development. To change is change is inevitable.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:01:23]:
It is said there’s only one constant in life, and that is change. Change happens whether we want it to happen or not. There’s always going to be change. Now what we can do is either we can be, scared of change, or we can try and hide from change or run run and hide from change, or we can develop, resilience, and adaptability, and use this to let us navigate life’s transitions, and to enable us to embrace change. Because embracing change opens doors to new opportunities, new insights, new possibilities for growth. Now this is changing all areas. This could be changing relationships, changing career, changing health, changing personal circumstances, changing any and every aspect of life. And the more we, the more we embrace change, the more we ourselves grow, personally grow, we become more resilient, we got ourselves to more opportunities.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:02:26]:
So, yeah, change, scary sometimes, but change is a good thing. It is a good thing. So what holds most a lot of people back with change is fear. We can be scared of change. Fear of change is it’s a perfectly natural, emotional response, and it comes about from uncertainty and the unknown. Change brings about so much uncertainty. Change takes us from where we are, which, as unpleasant as it may be, sometimes it’s comfortable. We know how to act.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:03:08]:
We know what’s going on. We know what will happen when we do things. And change brings you the uncertainty and the unknown. It’s a different environment now. We don’t know how things are gonna be. We don’t know what’s gonna happen. So our fear of change comes from our, inbuilt, desire for stability, for security, for familiarity. And for for some of us, the thought of any of these being disturbed disrupted is enough to, prompt us to resist any any such change.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:03:42]:
Now why are we scared of this change? I can come from many, many, many different sources. Past experiences of trauma, for example, or past experiences of failure and rejection. We did something once before. We failed. That hurt. Oh, we’re not gonna attempt that again. Or we proposed something. We suggested something.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:04:05]:
We got rejected, maybe humiliated. That felt horrible. It felt awful. You know what? We’re not doing that again. Or, I mean, these are some of the reasons that we can be scared of change, or we might have we’ve been con sometimes we’re conditioned by society and by, by culture to, discourage risk taking, to to know our place, to stay where we are, to play small. And our unconscious mind then with all of that history, with all of the the, the culture, the learnings, all of all of that stuff, the conditioning, it perceives any change as a threat to our very survival, and that can activate the fight flight freeze, response that we, that we get, which protects us from that danger. The problem is fear of change, can hold us back many, many different ways, or many ways in which it will show itself. It’s not just fear.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:05:07]:
It can be many different ways in which we, in which the fear of change shows itself. It could be procrastination. The more we put off doing something Blakemore we’re putting off creating the change. Self doubt. Self doubt can be a strong sorcerer. Oh, I don’t know if I’ve got what it takes to do this thing, so you know what? I’m not going to do it. That’s that’s self doubt often, not always, but often can come from a, place of fear. We’re scared that if we make that change, things are gonna be different.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:05:48]:
So in order to avoid making the change, but without admitting that we’re scared, we throw in self doubt. We use that self doubt as a shield, as an excuse to not make the change. Perfectionism is another real real, way in which fear of change holds us back. The more we’re focusing on making what we’re doing at the moment perfect, the more we avoid reaching the point of having to change and do something something beyond it. And even even avoiding new opportunities, that’s a classic example of fear of change, a classic way in which fear of change manifests itself. We avoid taking on new challenges, taking on new opportunities. You should go for that promotion. Oh, I don’t know.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:06:39]:
Maybe. I don’t know. There’s a lot of fear involved in in that. Oh, I don’t know. That’s what’s holding us back. It creates mental barriers, limiting beliefs, you know, where we we believe that we’re just not good enough. We believe that we couldn’t succeed. We believe that people like us don’t achieve those sorts of things.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:06:58]:
All of these hold back our ability to adapt, our ability to grow, and even our ability to thrive in an ever changing world, and the world is constantly changing. So how can we overcome some of these fears? In fact, before we even look at that, let’s take a look at why change can be important for us as a form of our own personal growth. You see, change in any and all of its forms, well, that can be a catalyst for our own personal growth. And it does this by challenging challenge us. Easy easy for me to say. It does this by challenging us to step outside of our comfort zones. It challenges us to confront our fears and limitations. And by stepping out of our comfort zone, by by confronting our fears, by by confronting those limiting beliefs that we have, by confronting all these things that are holding us back, we grow.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:08:11]:
We adapt to new circumstances. We adapt to new opportunities. We grow beyond our old boundaries. We overcome those fears and break through those limitations which were holding us back. See, the reality is the reality is every single change that we make, whether it’s a big change or whether it’s a tiny small change, every single change that we make brings with it very useful lessons for us, brings with it insight into ourself, our place in the world, our understanding of what’s going on, All of which contributes to our own personal growth. Again, it prompts us to reevaluate our beliefs, our values, our priorities. It encourages introspection change. Or embracing change encourages introspection and self reflection, which is always a always a good thing.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:09:15]:
Always a good thing to reflect upon who we are, what we do, what we think, who we think we are. Growth, change, and and growth that that results from that encourages us to let go of old patterns of behaviors, old old beliefs, things which no longer serve us, creates a way for new experiences, new possibilities, growth, and abundance all around. So how what are some ways we can overcome our fears of change, and how can we, navigate transitions that change brings along? One of the things we can do to help us overcome fear of change is to develop develop a strong self awareness. Now by this, I mean, really get in tune with your thoughts, with your emotions, and with all the physical sensations that arise when you are facing a change. So you’re facing a change. What is going on? What’s going on inside in your inside your head, inside your heart, inside your whole body? What are you thinking? What are you feeling? What’s what’s happening? Notice all of this. And as you do so, also notice any any, resistance or any, avoidance patterns and non avoidance techniques, which are which are coming up when you think about, a particular change that you’re facing. Because all of these things will help you to identify the underlying fears.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:10:52]:
What’s behind it? Because it’s usually a fear that’s behind all of these. What is it that you’re actually scared of? Because in order to to to face to overcome a fear, first, you need to be aware of what it is. So, really, when you think about a change and and you suddenly get scared, what’s going on inside your head? What’s going on inside your heart? What sensations of you go? What notice all the things that are happening, all the things you say to yourself, all the resistance that comes up. Use this to a good hold on what exactly is it that you’re scared on that’s holding you back. And sometimes, just by shining a light on this, shining light on what’s what’s scaring us, we realize, I see it’s not actually that scary at all. Because it is the things lurking in the shadows that are always scarier than than when we confront them face on. Like, you know, like all the best old horror films, it was what was going on off screen, the bangs and noises that you couldn’t see what was causing it, the the disturbances in the shadows. That was always scarier than when you saw the thing actually in broad daylight.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:12:08]:
Other ways you can overcome these fears or start to overcome the fear of change is by, challenging your own limiting beliefs. Question them. What do you believe? Now a limiting belief, a belief is something that we hold to be true. Doesn’t have to have any religious or spiritual connotations. A belief is simply something that we hold to be true. We believe it’s true. Sometimes it’s helpful, Sometimes it’s less less than helpful. If you believe that no matter what you do, you will always screw up.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:12:48]:
It’s a bit of a limiting belief. It’s really gonna hold you back. Because when you start to do something, your mind’s gonna be thinking, ah, we always screw up. Let’s have a look. Oh, there we go. Something went wrong. I knew it. We screw up.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:13:00]:
Well, we tried. Let’s not let’s stop. That’s an unhelpful belief that we always screw up. Because let’s face it, whenever we attempt anything, some bits will work, some bits won’t. It’s the same for everyone. If you believe that every time I attempt every time I attempt something I screw up, you’ll spot examples of yourself screwing up. You go, that’s it. I knew it.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:13:23]:
Let’s just not bother. On the other hand, if you challenge that belief, and if you actually have the belief, everything I do, no matter what goes wrong, I truly believe I find a way to make it work. That’s a much more empowering belief because even when things go wrong, which they inevitably always will do, you see the thing going wrong. You don’t take that as evidence that you can’t do it. You take that as, hey. Look. See. Something’s going wrong.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:13:50]:
I always find ways to overcome these. I wonder how I’m gonna overcome this. Let’s see. It becomes a much more apparent one. So question the validity of your of your limiting beliefs. I always screw up. People like me could never achieve that. I haven’t got what it takes.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:14:09]:
Whatever belief it is that’s holding you back, resisting what the change that you’re facing, really get curious about it. Where did it come from? What’s actually behind it? Is there a different belief, a more empowering belief, which I could have? It’s not challenging with some of these. Some of this some limiting belief stuff you can work through yourself. Sometimes you’ll need a a a coach to to help you, but at the very least being aware of the beliefs you have which are holding you back is a great starting point. Another way to help overcome the fear change is by embracing the unknown. And a great way to do that is to change from being scared to being really curious. Be really, really curious about what is happening. What’s going on? What are the opportunities that are coming up? I wonder.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:15:08]:
What are the different ways in which I might be able to find ways to make it work? What’s it gonna look like when it works out? What’s it gonna feel like when I found a way through? Get really curious about every step of it because when we have that, that’s really strong curiosity. Much much harder to be scared when you’re when you’re really curious about it. Really embrace the unknowns. Hey. This is something new, something I know nothing about. Cool. An opportunity to learn, to discover more. There are no rules.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:15:42]:
There are no preconceptions. It’s an open book. I’m not saying this is easy, but each of these steps, the more you start these things, they the greater the results you get, the easier it becomes to to to do these things. And don’t give steps. You don’t have to take great leaps. Take small steps, tiny little step at a time. Gradually you expose yourself to this change by taking a small manageable step. Don’t leap out of your comfort zone.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:16:15]:
Just take that even if you just take that tentative one step out. It’s a good thing that you have stepped beyond it. Take that tentative step. Notice what’s happened. Notice what doesn’t happen. Like the world, grand doesn’t open up and spatter you up. The sky doesn’t fall in. Whatever you were scared of doesn’t actually happen.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:16:40]:
Take that small step, tiny, small steps, and celebrate. Celebrate every success along the way. Big or small, celebrate them. Acknowledge them. Recognize, hey. You know what? I was scared to do this. I said I’ve done the whole thing, but I’ve taken the first step. Feels good.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:16:56]:
Feels good. Take those small steps. As the saying goes, how do you eat an elephant? One mouthful at a time. Poor elephant. And another really strong way to overcome fear of change is to seek support. Surround yourself with, with like minded people who can give you guidance, encouragement, give you perspective, be a sounding board, or even just be your cheerleaders. Be there just to celebrate the good times. Be there with a shoulder to cry on in the down times.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:17:33]:
Support can come in all sorts of different ways. The crucial thing is find your support, create your community, find a way to get that support as you’re going through this change. It could be you’re going with other people who are going through that change, might be people who’ve already done it, or it might be just that supportive friend who is who is always up for going, come on. You can do this. Let’s do it. Do that. Then we will go out and celebrate. Come on.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:18:00]:
You got this. All helps us to overcome those fears of change. So how can we, what other thing what other ways can we, navigate our way through change even if we’re starting to overcome some of these fears. Other things that we we can do, I mean, embracing change, we we we said get really curious about what’s going on. Embrace every opportunity, seize any opportunities, any opportunities for for, for changes. You don’t always have to go the whole way with a change. There’s no reason you can’t bail out if it turns out this is a change that isn’t taking you in the direction you want, but seize it anyway. At least give it give it a go.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:18:50]:
See what happens. See, by and do it with an open heart, an open mind, with that with that, air of curiosity. The more we do this, the more we throw ourselves into, seizing air, every opportunity that comes along, the easier it gets to seize these opportunities. And even if you grasp an opportunity and then partway through, go, you know what? This isn’t for me. This isn’t doing what I thought it was gonna be. That’s absolutely fine. The fact that you seize that opportunity, you gave it your best, you then realized this isn’t for you, and you then stepped away into something that is for you. The very fact you did that shows that, hey, even if we seize an opportunity, it’s not the wrong one for us.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:19:37]:
It’s not the end of the world. Again I’m not saying this is something you’re gonna be able to do straight off like that, but the more you start to do these things and as we said earlier, small steps, small opportunities, Just start with small things. It builds up. It builds up and builds up and builds up. Something else which is really helpful is to set yourself clear intentions. We’ve spoken before about how, the mind we’re we’re we’re constantly receiving millions of bits of information every second. We can only process things at a small part of that. Our mind sifts through for things that are relevant to us.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:20:18]:
When you set yourself clear intentions of of what you want, how you want to be, what you want to be doing, where you want to be doing it, set yourself these intentions. And in the previous episode, we looked at the difference between intentions and goals, intentions and outcomes, all these things. Intentions are really, really powerful. Even if you’re not setting goals, set intentions, and go check that previous episode, to to find out a bit more about it. But really get clear intentions on how how you want to be, how you want to be acting, how you want to be feeling. Because the more you set your clear intentions, and on Blakemore you set goals as well, it works with both of them, but the more you you get clear on your desired outcomes, the more your mind is able to filter everything that’s coming through and go, you know what? We want to achieve x. This opportunity here could take us in that direction. Another really powerful way to help to, embrace change, growth, navigate your way through all these transitions, Embrace flexibility.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:21:33]:
The best laid plans of mice and men often go wrong. Doesn’t matter how well you plan things. Never works out quite the way you think it will. It’s been said many times in many ways, Robert Burns, The Best Laid Plans of Mice and Men, Gang Afterglade, In The Art of War, it talks about how, you create plans. Your battle plan never survives the first encounter with the enemy. You’ve always got to be flexible. Have your plans. Have your your, your idea of where you’re going, of what you Keith things are gonna happen, and be flexible.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:22:14]:
Be flexible. Be adaptable. Be prepared for everything you thought was gonna happen to turn completely differently. And you know what? That’s good. Adjust your plans based on what is happening rather than carrying on based on what you thought was going to happen. Chain course corrections, new opportunities, perspectives, changing as you go along, the better the quality of outcomes that you’re gonna have and the better the quality of the journeys that you’re gonna go on along the way. Flexibility is absolutely crucial because, yes, there will always be change, but even that change will change. Get curious Curiosity, flexibility.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:23:06]:
If there are only 2 things you take out of this whole thing, curiosity and flexibility would be the 2. Get really curious about how you’re gonna do things, curious about what’s gonna happen, curious about how you can make the most of it, and be flexible so that when you do something and it turns out differently, you go with the flow. You don’t know, well, that’s not supposed to happen. It should be this. Why is it not this? You just go, oh, okay. It’s that now, is it? Okay. Let’s see what we can create with that. Curious.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:23:38]:
Curiosity, flexibility. 2 really, really powerful, allies to really help you with all of this. And kind of tying in with some of these, again, it’s something we’ve spoken about Blakemore. Mindfulness. Practice mindfulness, being able to stay grounded and stay in the present. In the present moment, not dwelling on the past and what happened and what didn’t happen and what should have happened and what could have happened. Don’t dwell on the past. It happened.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:24:15]:
Acknowledge it. Build upon it, but don’t dwell in it. Likewise, don’t worry about what might happen in the future, what could happen, what maybe, what could have been going to have maybe happened if something else might turn out to be happening? It gets very confusing, doesn’t it? Exactly. That’s the point. Don’t dwell in the past. Don’t worry about the future. Stay mindful. Stay present.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:24:43]:
Stay grounded in the present. The present moment is the only moment you can do anything about. Yes. It can guide the future. And, yes, you need to be have an awareness of what could come along in the future. But don’t be worrying on it. Don’t be living in it. Don’t be living in the past.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:25:01]:
Learn from the past. Be aware of possibilities coming up for the future, and be grounded and present in the present moment. Brilliant for all aspects of life, but really good for helping you, address change, live with change, work with change, and grow with change. Hopefully, those that’s given you, a few ideas on, how to how to embrace change and how to grow, through change. I’ll just leave you with with a few just quick tips. Give you a few final tips to point us on how you how you can embrace change for growth. Tip 1, release the past. Let go of the past.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:25:53]:
Holding on to past experiences, past regrets, resentments, grudges, all it does ultimately is just weighs you down, anchors you in the past, doesn’t let you grow. Release the past. Let go of the past. Trust the process. Whatever change you’re going through, trust it. Trust that change is a natural part of life’s journeys. Everything changes. Change is always happening.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:26:21]:
Just go with it. Go with the flow. Trust the process. Practice acceptance. Acceptance is the first step towards letting go, and it really brings those previous two steps together. You, practice acceptance. Acknowledge your emotions, honor your emotions, positive or negative. Accept and honor them without judgment, without resistance.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:26:44]:
Accept, honor, acknowledge what has happened in the past, and let it remain in the past. You accept while this has happened. That’s what I need to work with. This is a hand I’ve been dealt. Okay. That’s the hand I need to play. Mindfulness, as we touched on, cultivate mindfulness that helps you with that, awareness and being grounded in the present moment. You do this through meditations, check out the 5 minute meditation podcast for example, deep breathing, or just sitting and quietly or quiet reflection.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:27:26]:
You develop cultivate that mindfulness. Focus on what you can control. Don’t fret about what you can’t. So don’t be fretting about things that are out of your control. Whatever’s going on, there will always be something that’s in your control. It may be something tiny. It may be something as as tiny and insignificant seeming as everything is going wrong. I can sit here and just do some quiet breathing for a moment.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:27:56]:
That’s the only thing I’ve got control of right in this moment. So you know what? That is what I am going to do. Bring some calmness, and then find the next thing that you can control. Focus on what you can control. Don’t fret about what you can’t. Because when you shift your focus from what you can’t control, shift it to what you can control, That brings your agency. It create enables you to create proactive steps to move forward and create positive change out of whatever is going on. And, finally, I would say, excuse me, embrace impermanence.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:28:35]:
Recognize that change is inevitable. Nothing lasts forever. Embrace the impermanent nature of life. That helps helps you to enjoy what is happening now, helps you to enjoy the present moment knowing that this isn’t gonna be here forever. Let me enjoy what is here, what is now. And also if the things I’m not enjoying, they’re not gonna be here forever either. Embrace that impermanence, Letting go of attachment to to what was, what should be, what is. Just accept things as they are, and it’s impermanent.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:29:12]:
It is gonna change sooner or later. Perhaps practice gratitude for the present moment for what’s going on. That’s what I wanted to share with you today. Some just some thoughts. Hopefully there you’ve got some some ideas on on how you can best, embrace change and how you can you can grow through embracing change. I wonder, don’t you have curiosity, what was the bit that you enjoyed most? What is if there was one thing that you got out of all this that made you go, you know what? Yes. That makes sense. What would it be? Do let me know.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:29:50]:
I love I love love getting feedback from from you from your on from everyone who who catches these. Do let me know what you thought. Do let me know what you what you took from it. Remember to give us a like, a comment, a share, subscribe on your favorite platform, give us a review on your favorite platform. It all helps. And either way, whatever happens, take care. Look after yourself. I will catch you in another episode very, very soon.

Keith Blakemore-Noble [00:30:15]:
Bye for now.